What people are saying…
Jessica M.
“I bought this Lazy Susan to make dinners more efficient, but now nothing stays where I left it. I set down the salt, blinked once, and it was gone. My family has started accusing each other of moving things, but it’s clearly Susan. Susan cannot be trusted.”
Jacksonville, FL
Bought: Lazy Susan
Plankton Boardman
Next-door Neighbor
Bought: Accent Table
“I ordered this accent table expecting it to accent my room. Instead, it became the main character. My couch is insecure now, my lamp refuses to talk to it, and my cat has declared it king of the living room. Extremely disruptive furniture.”
Chip N. Shavings
Nashville, IN
Bought: Cutting Board
“I bought this cutting board and now my onions feel judged. Every time I chop something, it just sits there… silently… like it knows my secrets. Also, my knife got sharper out of spite. Would not recommend unless you enjoy being emotionally evaluated by wood.”
Dr. Maple Syrupson
Family Dentist
“I bought this coffin as a joke but now it’s the nicest piece of furniture in my house. My bed feels cheap, my couch feels lazy, and my coffee table has started questioning its purpose. Also, my guests refuse to sit near it, which is inconvenient but understandable.”
Bought: Coffin
Holly Wood
“This chessboard is cursed. I set it on the table, played one game, and now my rooks refuse to cooperate. The knights keep conspiring. I don’t know if I’m playing chess or living in a tiny, wooden soap opera. 0/10, would not sit near again.”
They met at the grocery store…
Bought: Chess Board
Jack
“This display case made my collectibles look too important. My action figures now have a higher status than I do. Guests ask about the display instead of asking how I’m doing. Emotionally devastating. Great craftsmanship, unfortunately.”
has a truck
Bought: Display Case